Chapter 1
On the day of our wedding, a car crash claimed the lives of both my parents and Adam Hacith’s.
Everyone said it was my fault for insisting on holding the wedding that day.
THE
I knew Adam blamed me, too. I spent every ounce of energy trying to atone, hoping he
someday move on.
It was the sixth year of our marriage–and the sixth year since I was diagnosed with depression. Drowning in that endless darkness, I saw my parents and in–laws, who I believed had been dead for six years.
“Adam, are we really doing the right thing? Sophia has changed a lot over the years.”
“Just because we once called her ‘princess,‘ she thinks she actually is one. A girl like her needs to be humbled. Honestly, I think things are just fine the way they are now.”
“Exactly! Our family doesn’t lack daughters. We need to think about Kellie as well. You’ve always been far too soft on her.”
Standing outside the door, it felt like I was plunged into icy waters. The last thread I’d been clinging to snapped.
“Hello, I’d like to schedule euthanasia for next week. I… I can’t keep going.”
***
The day my severe depression returned, I plastered on a smile and went
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home. I followed my usual routine, which was buying groceries, cooking, feeding the dog, and cleaning.
The clock continued to tick. I sat at the dining table in a daze, staring at the hot meal as it gradually lost its warmth. My stomach churned with hunger, but I felt no desire to eat.
The door swung open. Automatically, I smiled and reached for Adam’s slippers, but someone else got there first.
Laughing, she held up the drunken man, her words cutting deep. “Sophia, today is the memorial day for our parents. Why were you with another man again? Adam doesn’t want to see you right now. Let me take care of him.”
My hand hovered in the air, motionless. A weight like a boulder pressed down on my chest, and no amount of frantic breathing could ease it.
For all those years, Adam had always had someone around him. I kept convincing myself, “He’s in too much pain and needs a way to cope. As long as… as long as his heart remains intact.”
But this moment felt different. The person next to him was my own sister, Kellie Kimbere. She had free access to his office, his home, and even his bed.
I gazed at a face so uncannily similar to mine, and a deep, persistent ache filled my heart. As a child, I lost my parents. Now, as an adult, I was losing Adam.
She was like a spider web, intricately spun around me, as if everything I held dear and yearned for would ultimately belong to her.
Determined not to give in, I held Adam’s arm. “Husband and wife should stand by each other. There’s no such thing as being a burden.”
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Adam looked at me with misty eyes. He often looked at me like this, his eyes brimming with love. He would say he could never tire of gazing at me, that even a moment without seeing me was a moment of regret.
Perhaps it had been too long since he looked at me that way, or maybe I was on the brink of breaking down. Tears filled my eyes and uncontrollably streamed down my face.
Suddenly, I felt lightheaded and was pushed to the ground. He grabbed my jaw firmly. “Who was the man you saw today? You were laughing so joyously!”
“I… I didn’t meet anyone!”
The overpowering stench of alcohol hit me as he spoke with biting sarcasm. “You went to see your therapist again, didn’t you? Can’t even come up with a new excuse!”
“Sophia Kimbere, do you even have a conscience? After causing so many deaths, you still manage to laugh. Aren’t you scared they’ll haunt you at night?”
I dropped to my knees, wracked by a painful cough as guilt surged through me once more.
This was all my doing. Entirely my fault.
If I hadn’t insisted on having the wedding that day, the car accident wouldn’t have occurred, and our parents would still be alive.
Howard Hacith and Mary Hacith were incredibly kind. They told me they had no daughter and promised to treat me like their own once we were married.
Back then, Adam would sit with them, clicking his tongue in mock annoyance. He joked that they had “forgotten their son since gaining a
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daughter–in–law,” but his face was filled with pride and joy, as if celebrating the moment he would finally wed me.
But everything changed. What was supposed to be my happiest day turned into a nightmare, trapping Adam and me in the past.
He married me, but he also learned to resent me.
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