Shane’s hands were like steel traps on my
shoulders, his eyes bloodshot.
“Talk to me! If something happens to that ki—”
He stopped himself. “If something happens, can you live with that?”
“What are you talking about? I have no idea what you mean.”
His grip was painful, and I wrestled out of his grasp.
“In this weather, who goes out to work in the fields in the middle of the night? It’s freezing!”
Hearing the word “freezing” seemed to drain all the color from Shane’s face.
He stopped trying to hide anything and bolted
<
out the door like a madman.
I watched him go, smiling.
In the empty fields at dawn, his son had been freezing in the cold for hours.
A baby abandoned by his own father.
So sad.
Ha!
My neighbor walked in, waving a plastic bag.
“Claire, the farm gave out pork. Still taking it to Shane?”
Shane came from money and had always had it easy.
I felt sorry for him and Shelly, not used to
hardship.
<
I always saved the eggs and cornmeal for them,
never mind the pork we got once a year.
I ate dry corn bread, washing it down with
water.
They were sucking me dry, and laughing behind
my back for being such a fool.
I dug my nails into my palms.
“No more taking anything to Shane.”
She looked shocked.
Everyone knew I liked Shane, that I’d give him
the last grain of rice.
Now, suddenly, I’d changed.
From now on, all the good stuff was for me.
Screw Shane, let him choke on it!
<
I started cooking pork and glass noodles right
away, and corn bread so good I almost bit my
tongue off.
Guess a woman’s life really does improve when
she dumps a man.
Outside, I could hear neighbors gossiping.
“Shane went crazy, ran to the hospital with a baby he found who was half–frozen, they say.”
“Poor kid, the doctor said they brought him in too late, there might be lasting damage.”
“Shane begged the doctor on his knees. Never thought he had it in him, but he’s got a big heart, worrying so much about a foundling.”
I sneered.
Of course he’d be worried.
<
That was the firstborn son he had with his
precious Shelly.
Maybe because it had been so long since I’d
had any decent food, or because I couldn’t
forget how Shane smothered my own baby, I got a sudden stomach cramp.
I knocked on the neighbor’s door, begging him to take me to the hospital.
After a shot, I started to leave, but I saw Shane arguing with a nurse, looking pale.
I heard that the baby was sick, and he didn’t have any money, and he was even willing to let the nurse drain his blood to sell it.
“You brought him in too late,” the nurse said. “A newborn like that, frozen for so long, he’s lucky to be alive. But he might have brain damage, or never talk.”
く
Shane saw me, and his eyes were filled with
rage.
He charged at me, hands around my throat.
“This is all your fault! If it wasn’t for you, none of this would have happened. You always go to the fields at four! Why didn’t you go today?!”
The nurse pulled him off me, and I coughed, gasping for air.
Shane was trying to kill me.
But wasn’t it his fault?
My voice dripped with sarcasm.
“Why are you so worked up about some random
baby? Seems like you knew he’d be there.
What’s he to you?”
Shane shut his mouth tight.
After a long pause, he softened his voice.
“Claire, this kid got a rough start. Would you
take him in?”
Knowing the kid would have a disability, still hoping to bind me to him for life.
Knowing I’d be shamed for raising a baby out
of wedlock, and not caring.
Shane had always seen me as a tool to hide his affair with Shelly.
To trick me into raising his kid, to drain my
youth, my heart, my money until I was sick and useless.
Then toss me away like trash.
<
I balled my hands into fists.
“There’s no way I’m adopting a moron,
especially not one who can’t even talk.”
Hearing the word “moron” made Shane’s face twitch, his veins popping.
I felt a surge of satisfaction and added, “If it
was a normal kid, maybe. But this? No way.”
Suddenly, a woman ran out from behind a curtain, screaming.
“Claire, watch your mouth! Who are you calling
a moron? Who are you calling a mute?”
It was Shelly.
She’d been listening the whole time.
Before, I liked Shane, so I treated his sister like family.
<
I worked two jobs, wore my fingers to the bone,
and saved up to make her new clothes, even
letting her have my chance to move back to the city, so she could live a good life.
But my love had become a weapon they used against me.
I saw the metal box she was holding, and my heart clenched.
That was my dad’s!
No wonder I couldn’t find it. She’d stolen it.
I snatched the box, but it was empty.
“Where’s the watch? My dad’s watch!”
I raised my hand to slap Shelly, but she started crying and hid behind Shane.
He show
<
He shoved me hard.
“I sold the watch! To pay for the hospital bills. If
you’d taken the baby in sooner, he wouldn’t
have ended up in the hospital! It’s all your fault!”
“Besides,” he added, “are dead people more
important than the living?”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.
Three years ago, Shane had fallen into the river, and my dad had saved him, drowning in the process. We never even found his body.
That watch was the last thing I had to
remember him by.
Maybe Shane realized what he’d said, because
he looked ashamed.
<
“Alright, I’ll buy it back when I have the money.”
I gritted my teeth.
“What about the picture in the watch? Surely
they didn’t take my dad’s picture too.”
