Chapter 2
It took me six years to realize that my love will always remain unrequired whether I speak about it. I couldn’t forget his blank gaze upon me whenever I showed signs of interest in him. His stares were as sharp as knives and the cold shoulder he offered, sending chills to the bones, which I was exhausted working under his orders ripping my remaining confidence into pieces. It was my loss; I knew. I gained nothing. And yet I kept holding on to the fact that no one still has his heart. My fantasies gave me courage to stay and endure a little more.
But I was wrong, again,
“You don’t have to come with me to tonight’s ball. I have a companion this time,” was what he told me a minute before my work ended for the day. “If you’re wondering who, well, she’s my fiance.”
A fiance!!
My world crumbled into pieces by what he said. It wasn’t just a fling or a business companion but his fiance- someone he’d marry, eventually. He might not have someone he loves, but it doesn’t mean no one could stand beside him, holding his hand, calling herself his wife. And that woman wasn’t and probably would never be me.
For him. I’m always the person following quietly behind as I maintain several feet distance while holding a thick notebook and a pen, awaiting every instruction he’d give and noting them down. My sole purpose in his life is to give him support as he keeps soaring high up, perhaps until he’s out of reach. That has been my role ever since I vow loyalty to him, pushing my feelings aside as it could only ruin what we already have. But the word ‘fiance weighed heavier than I thought. I couldn’t utter a word as a response. Well, I didn’t think he expected me to say something about it.
anyway.
And so I went to a place I called my paradise and drowned myself in alcohol; the dejected heart’s best friend. I’m able to unleash the ‘real‘ me when I’m drunk and it’s the greatest pleasure I have in my life so far. As the CEO of a well–known company’s secretary for years, I learned to act prim, and I had to master proper etiquette during work hours. After a tiresome, busy day, I let out the beast within me with wines and whiskeys. I never held myself back when drinking as 1 became an expen in wearing a pleasant mask the next day when facing my boss and, well, the love of my life.
Acting should be my secondary career. I just know I do well in it
But last night’s incident was far more troublesome than a hangover
Great! I remember everything. From how I conversed with this man until we agreed on something I should not have suggested.
I slept with Jared Greenwelche, not only once, but twice. He’s someone whom I’m not even familiar with. Aside from his name and the rumors. following behind him everywhere, he’s a stranger to me..
I’m doomed
“Damn…” I could forgive myself for a shameless act I did last night when I was drunk, but to do it again when I’m sober. I must be crazy!
“You’re awake.”
1 look and face Jared.
Before I could say anything, a hand snakes around my waist, pulling me towards its owner in a tight embrace.
“You can
can go back to sleep. I won’t leave you, I promise.” He lifts his leg and places it over me.
No. Just leave. Please.
I’ve been wondering and would like to ask him. How can he be so calm like this?
He treats me better than I expected. When we did it again in the morning, he was considerate. I may be insane to think that he likes me, than that, I can’t come up with any reason he should act this way.
but other
“Jared?” I bite my lower lip while waiting for his response. A quiet bum from him is the cue for me to continue. “Why Why are you treating me like this!”
My heart skips a bear when he let out a sigh.
Is he angry? Disappointed? Why did he sight These questions rush to my brain like lightning striking in a blink.
“Daphne…” His voice remains calm. “Do you still not remember everything? Should we do in again for you to recall what you had promised me before all of this started?”
1keep quiet. No matter how much I think about the reason he’s not treating me like a trash who threw herself at a random guy while drunk, I still couldn’t find an answer. As for the promise, I don’t think that would be enough to justify this rare treatment 1 get from him.
“Or do you still plan to forget everything that happened after stealing my first night?”
1/3
His first night!! I swear my eyes popped out because of what he said. Is he like the type to mourn over his lost virginity even though he’s a guy? Wait, scratch that. It doesn’t matter whether he’s a man or a woman, Everyone should keep and protect their purity no matter what Speaking of the first night.
“I–It’s also my first night!” My brain freezes. Why did I have to say that! I’m so stupid.
“Yeah. I know.” Jared moves his face a little to face me. “It’s both our first nights, so it’s only reasonable to take responsibility for each other. Don’t you think so!
He’s smiling as he speaks. But why do I feel like crying in terror? He must be thinking of something while saying those words. Is he threatening me? But we are both adults and it wasn’t like I forced him or maybe I did?
“Daphne, did you really forget how bold you were last night? Since it’s both our first time, you’re supposedly gentle and reserved, but the lions in the jungle would probably be shy by your fierceness.”
Say what
Is this how he differentiates between expectation and reality?
“I bravely accepted your flames with open arms. Don’t even think of running away after what you’ve done.” He looks me in the eyes. “You also said you don’t have a lover so I guess it will not be a problem for us to marry”
Hold on a minute. I have to stop him before he continues giving suggestions.
“Why? You don’t want to many yer? Im fine with dating if that’s what you wanted only for now.
Marriage? Dating? I suddenly realize that I’m speaking with Jared Greenwelche. He might be nice for now, but plans to show his fangs later if I don’t agree with him. Still, getting asked for a marriage… or taking a lover.. I don’t expect it to be like this.
“Jared, let’s calm down.” I need to leave as soon as I can. This man is out of his mind!
“I’m calm, Daphne.”
“No, you are not. If you are, you won’t be saying things like marriage or dating Not to me whom you just met.
This is my last chance to escape. I have to help him realize that I’m not the one who’s suitable for him. That he deserves someone else, not me–a drunkard he slept with after bumping into him in the bar.
“If it’s not you
then who else?
I’m taken aback by his words. The Jared in my head should be someone who intimidates anyone in front of him by his key gaze and harsh words. He shouldn’t be like the one who’s talking to me. Then again, those prejudices based on the rumors about him could be baseless, too.
“I asked you twice when you came to me and your answer never changed. Now that it comes to this, why do I feel you’re trying to get rid of me? Am I not good enough!”
He sounds like he’s dumped, though that’s my intention I don’t love him and he docin love me. What happened between us should rernain as history. Even the promise made. He should not have believed it.
Tsk! It’s my fault. If only I didn’t approach him that time.
“What did you say?” He asked me amid the crowd.
I was sipping the nth glass of wine I have for the night ben I spotted a beautiful man standing in the sea of drunk and wasted people. I couldn’t stop staring at him. I did not satisfy the beast within me, so I came closer and started a conversation.
Me plus alcohol is always equal to shamelessness.
I smirked and wrapped my arms around his shoulders. “I said, you’re beautiful. You’re exquisitel”
I saw him curl his lips a hit, which made me feel more excited. His beauty was the opposite of Lucas, my first love, but I can’t help getting attracted
“must be nice if it’s you.” I mumbled after chugging down the last drop of my drink. “Yeaht How I wish it’s you not him just you.” I didn’t know why I said those words back then, but maybe because I got to hug him in my saddest moment. It’s something that’s hard to achieve with Lucas even though we’ve known each other and were friends for years.
The warmth he gave me as he hugged me back soothed the irking pain wandering in my heart
“Why?” That’s what he asked me when he heard what I said. I thought it wouldn’t be a big deal to talk about my private matters to a stranger, as almost everyone seemed to do it whenever they’re down. With no reservation, I told him about my first love, along with the pain I’ve kept for six long years. I didn’t forget to include the part where I wanted to move on and stop loving that man who ‘unknowingly broke my heart many times.
Chapter 2
I convinced myself that Lucas didn’t know how I felt about him to save my pride. But after telling me with a straight face he has a fiance, I came to know that he’s been drawing lines since my feelings first bloomed. It annoyed me. I couldn’t blame Lucas. Without a proper confession, he had all the rights to reject or accept my feelings. It’s all up to him. We’re not playing a guessing game.
“Then F
forget. If loving him hurts you like this. I think you should forget.”
That time, it was my
turn to ask him “Why‘ and he answered me.
“Because you deserve to be loved. Everyone does. And who knows, maybe one out there loves you the way you love him without you
knowing”
“Someone like who? By any chance, do you love me?” I joked at him. The influence of alcohol had spread throughout my senses. I was getting bolder and shameless, and I knew I’d regret it the next morning, yet I couldn’t help but continue the conversation we had.
“Did you fall in love with me at first sight?” I remembered laughing hard after asking him a silly question.
“No. But maybe in the future. If I keep watching you like this, I might fall.”
The next thing I did was the biggest mistake of my life, I pulled the beautiful man for a kiss and said. “Then keep it up. I won’t leave unless you fall
for me
“And what if I fall?” 1 saw hints of fear glistening through his eyes.
“Don’t worry, I won’t be like that man whom I loved so much. Since it’s me whom you’ll fall in love with, I’ll take responsibility for your feelings.”
3/3
